Wednesday, October 5, 2011

BREAKING NEWS: Jesus Will Not Be Watching The Superbowl!

I have absolutely no idea who the winning team members will thank at the end of the game while they are being interviewed by every news outlet.  I mean if Jesus isn't going to be watching or supporting or predetermining the winner ..  what are we to do?  Well we can all start by blaming it on Madonna!!!   After Mondays announcement that Madonna would be performing the half time show at the 2012 Superbowl, the religious zealots have dug through their files and pulled out all those old press releases that they screamed during her 'Blonde Ambition' tour.  Bill Donahue of the Catholic League sent out a press release demanding that the NFL reconsider having Madonna as the halftime entertainment.
The NFL cannot expect Catholics to be treated any different.  JC Chasez may be known for some dicey lyrics, but he is chopped meat compared to Madonna.  For decades, Madonna has blatantly offended Christians, especially Catholics.  The offensive lyrics, lewd behavior and misappropriation of sacred symbols are reason enough not to have her perform.  Worse, she has repeatedly mocked the heart and soul of Christianity: Jesus, Our Blessed Mother, the Eucharist and the Crucifixion.  If JC Chasez is unacceptable to the NFL to perform during halftime at one of its classic games, Madonna must be deemed unacceptable to perform at the Super Bowl.  There is only one playbook in this game.

Really??  Seriously??  I love me some Madonna and have followed her career from the beginning, but we are both a little ... ummm ... wiser!  She no longer needs to grind on beds singing during an obvious orgasm or run around a stage waving crucifixes while monks in hot shorts dance around her.  Well she kinda still does that, but hey she still has to keep her "anti"-fan base pissed!  We all know that Madge is loving this!  This type of press is what she built her empire on.  I mean everyone knows that if you really want to send her into a tirade of disgust, you give her hydrangeas.  To say that you disapprove of her and her music, well that just makes her giggle and makes her twat tingle.  And although being one of her biggest fans, I am really quite surprised that after all this time she is still this controversial.  We can definitely expect a performance that makes Janet's wardrobe malfunction look like a youtube video of a bucket full of kitties.

(Editors Note:  I had to google the JC Chasez thing as well.  It was the year after nipple-gate and the NFL was still in Code Red Conservative Mode and he refused to change some of the lyrics to his song so they decided to go with someone else.)

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